We live in a fallen world

I always thought I had a pretty good relationship with God. I have always believed if you are a decent person and don't commit heinous crimes, you will go to heaven. Now, after attending church and really studying the word of God, I don't believe that so much anymore. You aren't really worshiping God if you pray when things go wrong in your life or if you are generally a nice person. That's not worshiping God. Most people turn to God only when they hit rock bottom. Isn't he more that that? If you really think about it, how often do we take advantage of our God? Is he just a convenience? Do you really worship him? Do you truly have faith in him? I didn't. I still have a hard time trusting God in everything I do. Sometimes I feel it would be easier to be a believer if we could reach God like they used to in biblical times. There are times when I have felt the presence of God right beside me, but I'm sure there are numerous times I just couldn't see him. It's not that God isn't with us, we just choose not to see him. God wants to be close to us, but so many of us just get by. We don't realize when God is right there beside us. We have so many other things in this world tempting us that we can't see him begging for us to turn to him. Someone I know said if we could just get a peek at heaven maybe people would act differently toward God. But I think that heaven is just too much for us to bare. It is so wonderful that we couldn't handle knowing how wonderful it is. Some people think that the way we live is the life. We have it made living in America. So many freedoms we have. If we saw how great heaven was, I believe people would go crazy. People would realize how awful and sinful this world really is. I don't think our minds could grasp the concept. If we truly try to see God and give him all of our faith, we can see him. So many people think they can do things on their own. We can't. We need God to guide us in the right direction. We need him. Our children need him. I would say my kids turned me to God. I didn't have the best relationship with God. I didn't really know him at all. If I did, I would have turned to him a lot more. I wanted my kids to have the opportunity to know him. There were some things that I couldn't explain to them about God. So I took them to church expecting the church to teach them. I ended up finding God myself. Why did I expect the church to teach them their faith? I took it for granted like so many people do. We need to be close to God and have an intimate relationship with him. We understand more about him and his ways when we get to know him. We live in a fallen world not because of God, but because of our own sin. Because we choose to turn away from him.

What is your idol?

Kevin and I went to our small group at Trent and Marianna's last night. We meet every Sunday night and discuss more in depth what the sermon was about for that morning. Our series for the past few weeks is titled Prison Break. Randall has been discussing how to break free from our hurts, habits, and hang ups. Last night Trent started off asking about how we deal with our hurts in our lives. I was so confused by this because I don't really think I have any life altering hurts that I have had to overcome. I had a good childhood. I grew up and married a wonderful man who I know adores me and I love him with all my heart. We have two beautiful children. I was confused by my "hurts". Trent said that sometimes our hurts can help other people when we share them. God gives us stories to relate to people. So....... what does that say about my story? Absolutely nothing. Am I the only one who is lost here? I want to reach people more than anything. I am a nurturer. I want to care for people. So if I don't have a story, how am I supposed to relate. Everyone else in our group meeting seemed to know exactly what their hurt was. AHHHHHH!!! I want a hurt to share too. Sad I know, but I felt left out. Then Marianna said that she had been reading a book about the idols we put before God. In the book it asked "What is the one thing in life that you just couldn't imagine living without?" She said her family. I totally agreed. I realized I may not have a hurt, but I do have a hang up. I have an idol and it is my family. God is supposed to be my only idol, but because I feel like I have to protect my family and constantly worry about them, my family becomes my idol. I am supposed to give my worries to God and allow him to protect my family. There is nothing I can do to prevent bad things from happening to my family. God has total control and I have to trust in him.

Emma-the little mommy

Kevin and I had to work the infant room at church yesterday. Emma stayed in the room with us. I thought I would eventually have to take her to her class because she was very jealous the last time we attempted this brilliant idea. To our suprize, Emma was actually a tremendous help! She was very carful with the other babies. When Kailyn would cry she gave her own baby to Kailyn to play with. Yes! This is the baby Eore that Emma has to have everywhere she goes, that she would almost pick over food, but not quite. I was so proud of her. Emerson, another little boy we were watching, kept dropping a toy that he was playing with and she would pick it up and hand it to him, step back, bend down at his level, and smiled. She would bend down to their level like she was a grown up and they were so much smaller than her. It was the cutest thing. I was telling the daycare about it this morning and they said she is the same way there. When Mills is upset she will find his blanket and give it to him. When Emily is having a bad day she will sit with her and share her baby Eore. What a good little mommy. I love her so much. I hope she always has a big heart for others. It's days like these that make me very proud to be her Mom.

Emma spent the night with Papa and Nanny for the 1st time

Daddy had emailed me early last week about Emma spending the night Friday night. Eventhough it was too far for her to be away from me, I said yes. He needs his time with Emma too. Afterall, she is the prettiest little sweet pea in the world. So he got her and they went to eat at a seafood restraunt. I called and he said she was eating fries and chicken livers. Ewww! I know isn't that nasty. My child will eat anything apparently. Daddy and Kathy seemed to have a really good time with her. Emma had a good time too. She pretty much adapts wherever she is. She's not a very needy child. As long as she has food and her baby, there are no problems.

Emma gets her ears pierced

I thought I wouldn't get Emma's ears pierced until she was old enough to decide for herself, but the more I thought about it and the more I talked to other parents, piercing her ears at an early age seemed to be the best choice. Mom got my ears pierced when I was 6 months old and I don't remember a thing. Abby, on the other hand, waited until she was about 6 years old. That was a horrible day. She went in and got one ear pierced. Then I remember my mom bribing her for over an hour to go back and get the other one done. It was terrible. All little girls want their ears pierced, but I think the older they get the harder it is. Well I finally decided I'm going to look into it. I didn't like the thoughts of going to some place in the mall and having some teenager with purple hair and black fingernails pierceing my baby's ears. My neighbor told me about a nurse who does piercings at a cosmetic boutique. That sounded so much more appropriate. I called and talked to the manager. He said she has been doing piercings for the past 12 years and most customers are infants. So I did my homework. I didn't just take her anywhere. So I was ready. Wait... no I wasn't. I can't do this! I called Mom and told her she had to go with me. I just knew if I went alone, we would leave with only one ear pierced. So Mom went with me and she held Emma. I just couldn't do it. What? I didn't want to be the bad guy. After all, I'm the one who usually takes her to the dreadful doctor visits. She cried, but it really wasn't as bad as I had pictured it. Dadoo, on the other hand, wasn't too happy about it. But when he looked at her pretty little ears, he couldn't resist telling her how pretty she was.

Cade competes at mathfest!

Kevin, Cade, and I went to the International Convention Center in Atlanta this past Saturday for Cade to compete in the mathfest competition. After all day of waiting, Cade finally started at about 2:00. After answering several math problems, Cade was in the top 90 students still competing. Yey! Once they get to 90 kids left, they are moved to a private room where parents have to wait outside. It reminded Kevin and I of American Idol. We just waited for the door to open. After waiting about 15 minutes, they all come out holding there place number. Cade came in at 12th place. We were so proud of him. We were even more proud when we found out he placed 12th out of 812 top ranked students in Georgia. Wow! We were blown away. We are very proud parents. Cade is such an intelligent person. I don't think he knows just how smart he really is.